The cable package is two hundred and twelve a month,
Which includes the hundred and eighty-seven channels, the brunt
Of which I’ve never visited, including several dedicated
To weather in a region I’m not in and the fated
Channels for people learning jewelry craft and for the auction
Of rare coins and for seventeen flavors of instruction
In the culinary arts aimed at demographics I’ve
Been told exist and must be paying to keep this alive.
It’s the cable package and it’s not cable anymore,
It’s the cable package and the bundle metaphor
Is a bunch of things tied together with a price
That’s less than the sum of parts but still the price of ice
On a sunburned shoulder, cold and necessary,
The cable package and the satellite auxiliary
Dish on the roof that costs a hundred-twelve to rent,
The cable package and the installation meant.
The installation window was between eight and six,
The technician arrived at four-fifty and the fix
Took thirty minutes but the box he brought was wrong,
He’d have to come back with the right one, stay strong,
The reschedule is two weeks out, the earliest,
The call center suggested the self-install kit, the tidiest
Solution for their bandwidth problem, which he couldn’t do,
The cable package and the customer service queue.
The streaming add-on is forty-seven more a month,
The bundle discount saves him twenty-two, the blunt
Math is twenty-five dollars more for the content
That lives on the streaming side, which is the intent
Of the bundling strategy, which is: you’ll pay more
But feel like you got a deal because the number before
Was higher and the savings feel real even when they’re not,
The cable package and the twenty-two it bought.