When the Weight Wins
I’ve been staring at the ceiling for the seventh hour straight
counting cracks like they’re the days I let evaporate
there’s a list of things I swore I’d do pinned above my desk
but the distance from this bed feels like climbing Everest
I know what needs doing, got the map drawn in my head
but my bones have turned to anchors
and I’m sinking in this spread
fear dressed up as comfort, wearing exhaustion like a mask
convincing me tomorrow’s when I’ll finally do the task
[Chorus] I’m paralyzed by motion that I’ll never make
watching myself waste away for some imaginary break
the hardest prison’s one you build inside your skull
where the bars are made of maybes and the sentence never dulls
the sun bleeds through the blinds and marks another wasted day
I rehearse all my excuses, got them memorized and weighed
“too tired, too broken, too far behind to start”
but the truth is I’m just terrified of falling apart
what if I try and still fail, what if effort isn’t enough
what if I prove that I’m exactly as broken as I thought
easier to never start than face that final proof
easier to stay right here beneath this soundproof roof
[Chorus] I’m paralyzed by motion that I’ll never make
watching myself waste away for some imaginary break
the hardest prison’s one you build inside your skull
where the bars are made of maybes and the sentence never dulls
I’m drowning in the shallow end, paralyzed by choice
while ambition screams inside me with its ever-fading voice
someday turned to never when I wasn’t looking close
and the person I intended died before I came the close
my potential’s just a ghost now, haunting every room
reminding me of battles that I forfeited too soon
[Chorus] I’m paralyzed by motion that I’ll never make
watching myself waste away for some imaginary break
the hardest prison’s one you build inside your skull
where the bars are made of maybes and the sentence never dulls