King Of Nothing
I act like I’m above all of them
like the party is lucky I turned up at all
I lean in doorways, arms crossed
critiquing every joke like I was paid to judge their fall
No one asked me to be the jury
but I crowned myself anyway in the silence between their laughs
I pick their flaws apart in my head so I don’t have to admit I’m terrified of being the one that cracks.
I keep myself just distant enough that no one knows me well enough to see the seams
Just close enough to watch, to sneer
to pick apart their stupid ambitions and soft dreams
I call them basic
blind to the bigger picture only I seem to see
But when I go home
all I have is a quiet room and this silence: “Who the hell is actually beneath this shell?”
I raise myself up by stepping on everyone else’s throat in my head
But in the real world, I’m just a guy in the corner
Full of unsaid.
I’m king of nothing
ruler of my own contempt with no one left to reign
Sitting on a throne made of inside jokes and bitterness
reigning over my own pain
If pride is the sin that strips you down till you’re alone with your reflection and your bluff
Then I’m royalty in a kingdom of emptiness
Too proud to call it what it is: Not enough.
They invite me out less now; word gets around when every conversation with you feels like being graded on a curve
They stop handing you their hearts when each confession gets dissected for how it fails to serve
I call them sensitive, weak
unable to handle “real talk” or “honest critique
” But the truth is
I’m jealous of anyone who can just be flawed and still feel complete.
I built this tower of superiority to avoid the humiliation of standing level and maybe being seen
Now the view is just rooftops and quiet streets and a horizon that never brings anything clean
No one prays for my fall because no one cares enough to watch my rise
I’m a legend only in my own stale eyes.
I’m king of nothing
ruler of my own contempt with no one left to reign
Sitting on a throne made of inside jokes and bitterness
reigning over my own pain
If pride is the sin that strips you down till you’re alone with your reflection and your bluff
Then I’m royalty in a kingdom of emptiness
Too proud to call it what it is: Not enough.
If I ever climb down and join the rest of them in the mud
sweating and laughing and fucking up in real time
It will be the first honest dethroning I’ve had in this life
Till then, I sit high, King of nothing
Repeating “I’m fine.”