Happy Hour Hero
The clock hits five and something in my bloodstream shifts,
the afternoon’s been long and now the evening lifts,
I’m pulling into the parking lot at quarter past,
the happy hour special runs till seven, I’ll make it last,
the bartender’s already got the draft glass in his hand,
he knows my usual order and my land,
I settle in the corner booth that’s been my spot for years,
and drain the first one like it’s oxygen, my friends.
The appetizers at happy hour are half the dinner price,
and everything at half the price is doubly nice,
I order the wings and the loaded nachos flat,
and another draft because the first one went like that,
the bar fills up around me with the after-work brigade,
we’re all here for the same redemption that the evening’s made,
ties are loosened, jackets folded over chairbacks wide,
the happy hour is the only church with cheap drinks inside.
Happy hour hero, five to seven every night,
happy hour hero, everything’s a little right,
the wings are half the price and the draft’s as cold as snow,
happy hour hero is the only way to go,
happy hour hero, tab that grows and grows,
happy hour hero, everybody knows,
the five o’clock salvation and the cheap and cheerful truth,
happy hour hero since I was in my youth.
By six I’ve eaten all the nachos and the wings,
and I’m surveying the menu for some additional things,
the mozzarella sticks are four dollars in this bracket,
the slider basket’s six and that’s a hell of a racket,
I order both because the math still works in favor,
of eating everything at half-off, the night savior,
the bartender refills without being asked to do it,
I am a loyal customer and he knew it.
The happy hour ends at seven but I’m still here at eight,
the prices went back up but the evening’s going great,
I’m on my third basket of something with the sauce,
talking to a guy who works in something that’s the boss,
of a company that does a thing I didn’t catch the name,
but we’ve agreed on everything, which seems like the same,
as friendship for the purpose of a Tuesday-evening run,
we’ll never see each other when this evening’s done.
Happy hour hero, five to seven every night,
happy hour hero, everything’s a little right,
the wings are half the price and the draft’s as cold as snow,
happy hour hero is the only way to go,
happy hour hero, tab that grows and grows,
happy hour hero, everybody knows,
the five o’clock salvation and the cheap and cheerful truth,
happy hour hero since I was in my youth.
The tab arrives at nine and I assess it with respect,
it’s triple what I planned but I triple-check,
and confirm that yes it is and tip accordingly well,
because the bartender kept me from the worst of hell,
the drive home is a little warmer than it was at five,
and everything the evening gave me kept me feeling alive,
I’ll be back at that corner booth by Thursday at the least,
happy hour hero rising from the east.
Happy hour hero, five to seven every night,
happy hour hero, everything’s a little right,
the wings are half the price and the draft’s as cold as snow,
happy hour hero is the only way to go,
happy hour hero, tab that grows and grows,
happy hour hero, everybody knows,
the five o’clock salvation and the cheap and cheerful truth,
happy hour hero since I was in my youth.
The clock hits five and something in my bloodstream shifts,
the afternoon’s been long and now the evening lifts,
I’m pulling into the parking lot at quarter past,
the happy hour special runs till seven, I’ll make it last,
the bartender’s already got the draft glass in his hand,
he knows my usual order and my land,
I settle in the corner booth that’s been my spot for years,
and drain the first one like it’s oxygen, my friends.
The appetizers at happy hour are half the dinner price,
and everything at half the price is doubly nice,
I order the wings and the loaded nachos flat,
and another draft because the first one went like that,
the bar fills up around me with the after-work brigade,
we’re all here for the same redemption that the evening’s made,
ties are loosened, jackets folded over chairbacks wide,
the happy hour is the only church with cheap drinks inside.
Happy hour hero, five to seven every night,
happy hour hero, everything’s a little right,
the wings are half the price and the draft’s as cold as snow,
happy hour hero is the only way to go,
happy hour hero, tab that grows and grows,
happy hour hero, everybody knows,
the five o’clock salvation and the cheap and cheerful truth,
happy hour hero since I was in my youth.
By six I’ve eaten all the nachos and the wings,
and I’m surveying the menu for some additional things,
the mozzarella sticks are four dollars in this bracket,
the slider basket’s six and that’s a hell of a racket,
I order both because the math still works in favor,
of eating everything at half-off, the night savior,
the bartender refills without being asked to do it,
I am a loyal customer and he knew it.
The happy hour ends at seven but I’m still here at eight,
the prices went back up but the evening’s going great,
I’m on my third basket of something with the sauce,
talking to a guy who works in something that’s the boss,
of a company that does a thing I didn’t catch the name,
but we’ve agreed on everything, which seems like the same,
as friendship for the purpose of a Tuesday-evening run,
we’ll never see each other when this evening’s done.
Happy hour hero, five to seven every night,
happy hour hero, everything’s a little right,
the wings are half the price and the draft’s as cold as snow,
happy hour hero is the only way to go,
happy hour hero, tab that grows and grows,
happy hour hero, everybody knows,
the five o’clock salvation and the cheap and cheerful truth,
happy hour hero since I was in my youth.
The tab arrives at nine and I assess it with respect,
it’s triple what I planned but I triple-check,
and confirm that yes it is and tip accordingly well,
because the bartender kept me from the worst of hell,
the drive home is a little warmer than it was at five,
and everything the evening gave me kept me feeling alive,
I’ll be back at that corner booth by Thursday at the least,
happy hour hero rising from the east.
Happy hour hero, five to seven every night,
happy hour hero, everything’s a little right,
the wings are half the price and the draft’s as cold as snow,
happy hour hero is the only way to go,
happy hour hero, tab that grows and grows,
happy hour hero, everybody knows,
the five o’clock salvation and the cheap and cheerful truth,
happy hour hero since I was in my youth.